Whatever Happens
by tvaddictlyfe
Summary: The story of Alexa Parker. A young and vivacious member of the group. She was only 16 when the epidemic broke out. After her family died she was left alone. She stumbled across Rick's group and never left
1. Chapter 1

The Walking Dead

Disclaimer: I do not own anything all credits go to the creator of the show.

**Chapter 1**

"Oh shit" I mumbled under my breath. I was drinking water while walking back to my makeshift camp and sloshed it all over myself.

"Hello? Police officer out here. Can I borrow some gas? Hello? Hello? Anybody home?" a man was looking into the house.

I gasped before jumping behind the nearest tree. He hadn't been here when I'd left to go down to the stream. I peeked around the corner and saw the man look inside the house. Bad mistake. The couple that was living here decided to off themselves. I went inside just once to look for any usable items or food they left behind when I first got here. The man turned around to start walk back and saw me.

"Hello?"

I stayed very still. Like a deer in the headlights. Not that it mattered now because he had already seen me. He kept walking towards me.

"Hello? I'm a police officer. I'm here to help you miss."

I stepped out from behind the tree and cocked my gun at him. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey easy" he held up his hands defensively, "easy. No one needs to get hurt. I'm a police officer; I was headed to Atlanta when I ran out of gas."

I kept my gun pointed, "Atlanta's dead, what business do you have there…..uh"

"Rick." He clarified, "how do you know Atlanta's dead?"

"I heard it was over run."

"But you don't know for sure?" I shook my head.

"Look are your parents around, you can't be that old, uhh….?" Rick asked.

"Lexie. I'm 16. It's just me." I mentally kicked myself. What a dumbass. I should've told him I had a huge group coming back soon, he might be less likely to try to rob me, or rape me.

"Where are you going Lexie?" Rick inquired.

"None of your business." I spat.

"Are you traveling with anyone?" He asked. I looked down at my feet. "Well with the state of things I don't think you should be on your own…I'm a police officer. You can accompany me too Philadelphia."

"Aren't I a little young for you?" I asked.

Rick chuckled and took a step closer, "Not like that Lexie. The way I see it we'd be better off together than we are apart. You watch my back I'll watch yours."

I thought it over, "Well since I don't have any other plans on this fine Georgia day…" I lowered my gun, "But let me make one thing clear, you lay one hand on me; I'll kill you and don't think I won't"

Rick nodded, looking semi-scared, "Understood. Now I don't suppose you have any gas laying around for a vehicle?"

I shook my head, "Oh you know what! I think I have the next best thing. Come on." Rick followed me to a horse pen. "I've been here for a few days but she hasn't let me tame her yet, I was planning on training her and taking her with me when I left anyway."

Rick smiled, "You did good kid; now let's see if we can calm her down now." Rick grabbed the harness draped over the fence and opened the gate closing in, "Easy now, easy. I'm not going to hurt you. Nothing like that. More of a proposal. Atlanta's just down the road a ways. It's safe there. Food, shelter, people, and other horses too I bet. How's that sound?" Rick slipped the bridal on the horse. Then he turned to me, "Lexie go get your stuff alright it's pretty early if we get out soon we can make it there by noon."

I nodded and ran over to the barn. I had been sleeping in the loft. This day was taking a weird turn of events. I climbed into the loft and looked over my stuff. I didn't have much, and I knew I couldn't bring everything since me and Rick were both riding the horse at the same time; that horse looked pretty weak. I sighed and opened my backpack and dumped everything out. 'Okay I'm definitely bringing my Brita water bottle" that was the most useful thing I had, other than my guns any water I could get to my water bottle was filtered so it was safe to drink. I threw in a pack of Oreos I had found in the house; I had a change of clothes and undergarments, my hat. A chic indie beanie that I couldn't live without. I turned and looked over my plethora of weapons. Those were all going to come. On my person I had a belt buddy belt, which held a 4 inch pocket knife in the buckle, it was useful and discreet, and nobody knew it was there. I had my .8mm in her holster on the side of her belt. I had my fold-up rifle for hunting in my pack and ammo for both the pistol and rifle. I had a knife in my backpack too, basically a dagger, a big one seven or eight inches long. I piled the rest of my food, a couple of cans of beans and a box of wheat things and my can opener in the front and zipped it up along with 2 big bottles of water in the side water pockets. In the smaller pouch I had her toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant utensils ring, hand sanitizer and a picture. I ran her thumb over the faces in it before putting it in my bag. Then rolled up my pillow in my sleeping bag and clipped it to my backpack and went to find Rick.

"Took you long enough Lexie. I was beginning to think you ditched me." Rick joked.

"Sorry I had to pack up everything I own at a moment's notice." Rick chuckled, "come on". I could see he had put on a police jacket and had a huge duffel strapped across his back that said 'Sheriffs'.

Rick jumped up on the horse, "Come one Lexie." He patted behind him.

I grimaced and swung my leg up and over the horse. As soon as I was situated I awkwardly grabbed his shoulders, his bag was draped across his lap, but I didn't want to put my hands anywhere near his belt region.

After I relaxed, Rick shook the reins, "Heyah!" The horse took off flying into next week.

I gripped Rick tighter, "Whoa, let's go easy I haven't done this in years, easy boy." He said.

After an hour of riding I felt awkward in the silence, "So what's your story Rick?"

He sighed, "Well… I was shot, on the job. I was in a coma. I woke up a few days ago and I'm trying to find my family."

"How do you know they're alive?" I asked.

"They took things, from our house, photographs, and our wedding video. Things a thief wouldn't take. I just have a feeling they're alive."

That must be horrible, to not know if your family is alive or dead. But most likely they were dead, practically everyone was but he seemed sad so I asked, "Tell me about them?"

"Well Lori, that's my wife, she was so pretty, long brown hair, and big brown eyes, and the most beautiful face. We got together pretty soon after high school. And then there's my son Carl. He's 10. He's so sweet." He paused, "I'm worried I won't find them."

I grimaced, "It's hard to lose people but you get used to it in this life. But I hope you find them. I'll do my best to help you."

Rick sounded like he was about to say something when I grabbed the reigns pulling the horse to a stop.

"What are we doing Atlanta's right there?" Rick said surprised..

"I just need to use the bathroom." I jumped off and started walking over to the treeline.

"Don't go too far Lexie." Rick said. I rolled my eyes and ducked behind a tree to do my business. We had just met and he was trying to tell me what to do?

When I was coming back she could see Rick was petting the horse. I walked back and set my bag down and started trifling through it.

"What are you doing now?" Rick asked.

"We don't know what we're going to run into in there I'd rather not be weak with hunger."

I opened a can of beans and pulled out my utensil ring. I offered it to  
>Rick first who surprisingly accepted. He looked weak, if he'd been in a coma he probably hadn't eaten. I didn't need dead weight. But if he was a sheriff he probably at least had a decent shot. I pulled out her water and took a long gulp before passing it to him and then we sat there enjoying the breeze eating beans and drinking water. It was going well until I heard a twig snap behind them. Rick and I both leapt up and turned around and saw a walker coming out of the tree line. Rick pulled out his gun ready to shoot.<p>

"Wait!" I frantically grabbed his arm. I pulled my knife out of her belt and ran over and stuck it right in the skull. As I turned around Rick stood there shocked. Well he was going to have to get used to this.

I walked back and pulled the sanitizer out of of bag. "You never shoot if you don't have to. Bullets are loud. Any walkers within a good couple mile radius could hear that shot go off, and then we'd be in trouble." I zipped up my bag and put my backpack on and offered the horse some water I cupped into my hands. Rick still wasn't speaking. He wasn't used to this yet.

Rick walked over, "Lexie, what's your story? Why are you all by yourself out here?"

I gave the horse a good nuzzle and then straightened out, "I don't have a story."

Rick looked down at me, "Everyone has a story."

I didn't even flinch, "Everyone I know or knew is dead, simple as that. When you don't have anyone or anything, you're left with something that's a whole lot less than what you were before this world."

Rick pondered this and then got back on the horse. I jumped on after him. As we got closer I could see the outline of the city. I felt the horse hesitate. I gulped and patted it's backside.

"Rick I-, I'm scared, I heard it was overrun what if we get cornered." I confided as I tightened my grip on his waist.

"Lexie I'm going to protect you okay? Either way if there's a shelter or no shelter we're getting out of here alive."

As we made our way into the city it was quiet. Too quiet. I heard movement and saw a couple walkers. The horse whinnied, it was getting skittish. I gulped again and poised one hand on my gun.

"Steady it's just a few. Nothing we can't outrun." Rick said confidently.

Just then we heared a motor and looked up to see a helicopter flying by towards one of the skyscrapers. "Follow that quick!" I yelled. "Heyah!" The horse took off. As we rounded the corner the horse leapt up practically knocking me off. There were hundreds of walkers there.

"Oh shit. Rick…!" Rick had stopped. "Rick! Turn back, turn back!" Rick turned the horse around but there were too many walkers. They surrounded the horse and the horse jumped off knocking both Rick and I to the ground. That's what I get for following this moron into an overrun city. I was going to die.

Rick and I got up and tried to run but they were everywhere, the horse was already down, "Lexie crawl under the tank!" I heard Rick yell. I ran over to the tank and got to my stomach and crawled under with Rick close on my heels. "Rick there's a hatch!" I shouted as I opened it. I climbed in then helped pull Rick up. Rick slammed the hatch shut just in time. He leaned back and then a dead soldier who had been bitten moved and tried to attack him. Of course Rick grabbed his gun and tried to shoot it.

"No Rick-!"I covered my ears just in time before the shot went off. Ringing was all I could hear for a good few minutes. Rick looked like he wasn't doing too hot either. After the ringing had subsided I looked at Rick waiting for him to think of a plan when I heard static from the radio.

"Hey you. Dumb ass." Rick and I leaned forward to listen. "Hey you in the tank, cozy in there?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Hey? You alive in there?"

"Hello? Hello?" Rick grabbed the transistor radio.

"There you are" the voice said. "I was beginning to wonder.

"Where are you?!" I asked frantically.

"Outside?" Rick jumped in. "Can you see us right now?"

"Yeah, I can see you. You're surrounded by walkers. That's the bad news."

"There's good news?" I asked hopefully.

"No." The man said bluntly.

"Listen, whoever you are, I don't mind telling you I'm a bit concerned in here." Rick said sarcastically.

"Oh man. You should see it from over here. You'd be having a major freak out."

Rick sighed, "Got any advice for me?"

"Yeah; make a run for it." The man replied.

"That's it? Make a run for it?" I said with a mix of annoyance and worry.

"Hey, my way's not as dumb as it sounds. You've got eyes on the outside here. There's one geek still on the tank but the others have climbed down and joined the feeding frenzy where the horse went down. With me so far?"

"So far." Rick replied hurriedly.

"Okay the street on the other side of the tank is less crowded. If you move now while they're distracted, you stand a chance. Jump off the right side of the tank, keep going in that direction. There's an alley up the street, maybe 50 yards. Got ammo?"

"In that duffel bag I dropped out there, guns too." Oh fuck. That bag had 800 rounds and enough guns to keep walkers at bay, for a while. "Can I get to it?"

"Forget the bag. It isn't an option what have you got on you?"

Rick looked at me I mouthed fifteen, Rick looked at his own gun and also counted 15. "30 rounds" He looked around and rested his eyes on the dead soldier, "and a Beretta with one clip." He finished grabbing it.

"Make them count. Be at the alley." The man said.

"Hey what's your name?" Rick asked.

"Have you been listening? You're running out of time!"

Rick slammed down the transistor radio. "Come on Lexie let's go. Stay close and shoot to kill. If something happens to me keep running for the alley. I'll try to cover you."

I smiled nervously, we were almost certainly leaving to our death, "See you on the other side Rick."

Rick grabbed a shovel then popped open the top to the tank. He jumped out and shot a walker. Then he helped pull me out before jumping off. He held out his hand to help me when a walker came out of nowhere less than 3 feet behind him. In one swift movement I pulled out my gun and shot it in the head, right next to Rick. Rick turned around to see the now dead walker as I jumped off. "Nice shot."

"You can thank me later." I said as I started running for the alley. We popped off a couple rounds and rounded the corner when I almost collided with an Asian guy. Rick almost shot the poor bloke thinking he was a walker.

The guy held up his hands, "Whoa! Not dead! Come on! Back here! Come on! Come on!" I followed him and Rick turned and shot another walker. "What are you doing?! Come on! Come on! Get up!" The guy said.

The guy started climbing a ladder to the roofs. I gulped before climbing after him and Rick went last. Once at a break in the ladder we all stopped, panting

"Nice moves there Clint Eastwood." He said to Rick. "You the new sheriff come riding in to clean up the town?" He added sarcastically.

"It wasn't my intention." Rick replied.

"Yeah, whatever, Yeehaw, you're still a dumbass…"

"Rick," he held out his hand, "and this is Lexie." He pointed at me, "Thanks."

"Thanks a lot, really." I said earnestly. I was grateful but nervous. People don't stick out there necks to help each other, not anymore.

"Glenn, you're welcome." Glenn looked down and there were maybe a hundred walkers surrounding the bottom of the ladder. No way in hell we'd be able to climb down. Glenn then looked up the ladder. "Bright side. It'll be the fall that kills us. I'm a glass half full kind of guy." Glenn started climbing.

"Lexie you be careful, don't rush or else you might slip, I'll be right behind you." Rick said. I nodded and started to climb with Rick close behind me.

We jumped across a couple roofs until we reached a hatch, which Glenn opened. The roof jumping scared me. I was petrified of heights. We started climbing down into an abandoned building then Glenn got on a walkie-talkie, "I'm back, 2 guests plus 4 geeks in the alley!" Two people in black uniforms came out and beat the walkers blocking the door and Glenn, Rick and I all ran in.

Right as we entered a crazy blonde woman slammed Rick back and pulled her gun and pointed it at him. "You son of a bitch! We ought to kill you!" She was breathing heavy.

Without missing a beat I pulled my gun out and took off the safety. Everyone heard the click and turned to see me with my gun pointed at the woman. The woman slightly tilted her head to see me out of the corner of her eye. Everyone looked nervous at the possibility of what could happen.

"Lexie put down your gun…" Rick said. I stood my ground. This is what I was worried about. A group of overzealous trigger happy morons.

"Just chill out Andrea. Come on back off." A guy said.

"Come on. Ease up." A woman said to Andrea.

Andrea kept her gun pointed, "you're kidding me right? We're dead because of this stupid asshole."

"Andrea!" The man got closer to her and looked at me, "I said back the hell off."

Andrea looked at me. "I have near perfect aim. Don't think I won't do it." I said with my gun still pointed at Andrea's head. Rick looked very nervous.

Andrea lowered her gun and practically sobbed. "We're dead. All of us. Because of you." I lowered my gun and walked over to stand by Rick.

Morales was explaining to Rick why he was stupid and how the walkers now knew we were here. We followed Morales into the store.

"The hell were you two doing out there anyway." Andrea asked.

"Trying to flag the helicopter", Rick replied.

"Helicopter? Man that's crap there ain't no damn helicopter," T-Dog said.

"Yes there is we heard it!" I said defensively.

"You were chasing a hallucination. Imagining things, it happens." Jacqui said.

"We saw it!" Rick said firmly..

"T-Dog try to contact the others!" Morales said.

"Others?" Rick asked.

"You mean the refugee center? " I asked hopeful.

"Yeah the refugee center". Jacqui replied. "They got biscuits waiting at the oven for us."

Just then we heard gun shots start going off and we all ran up to the roof. Where I could see a man standing on the ledge popping off rounds.

Merle and T-Dog got in a fight and Rick went over to try to help and took a fist to the face. I stood as far back as I could, while everyone was trying to break up the fight. I knew when to intervene, and this wasn't one of those times, I wasn't about to get involved.

After Merle was chained I looked over the edge down onto the street. Where there were hundreds of geeks. Shit I'm never going to get out of this. I was better on my own, I thought to myself. I was waiting for someone to think of a plan. That was my problem. I needed to start thinking of my own plans and stop letting myself get put into stupid situations. My luck would run out eventually, I had to start being smart.

Glenn and Morales tried to find a way out through the sewer and Andrea, Rick and I were in the shop. I was looking at a clothes rack. If I was going to die I might as well look nice.

"Sorry about the gun in your face." Andrea said to Rick, "and for scaring you", she said to me. I shrugged and walked over to look at another clothes rack.

"Is she okay?" Andrea whispered to Rick.

"She's fine." Rick replied.

"I'm sorry about scaring your sister. I wouldn't have shot you." Andrea admitted.

"Oh we're not related. We ran into each other on the road and have just been protecting each other." He looked over at me but I was turned around and I saw him out of the corner of my eye, "She lost her family, she's a good kid; tough. How you have to be in this world."

"I'm really sorry. If we ever get back I have a sister who's about her age. Maybe they can be friends." Andrea smiled half heartedly.

Rick slightly chuckled, "If we get out." I angrily grabbed an arms full of clothes roughly my size to put in my bag. If we get out. _If_ being the key word.

After a failed sewer attempt they had decided to slime Rick and Glenn in guts and go out to draw attention away. I didn't want to be separated from Rick. He was a good person. I didn't know these people. Before that Rick pulled me aside. "Hey, I want you to be careful okay? Stay with the group. Thanks for saving me. That one time with the geek on the tank. I owe you. I'll come back for you I promise."

I just nodded as Rick turned to walk away, "Rick?" He turned back. "Be careful, I actually kind of like you and it would suck if you died." I admitted.

Rick smiled and walked over to Andrea. "Andrea? Do you mind, if I don't come back…" He gestured to me.

"Of course like she was my own." Andrea replied.

"Great now let's get covered." Rick replied faking enthusiasm.

Everyone rushed to the rooftop to watch Glenn and Rick. Once they had made it to the trucks everyone cheered and grabbed their stuff and raced down to the loading dock to get in. Merle got left behind. I for sure didn't mind. He was dangerous.

I hopped into the truck as everyone loaded gear into it. Morales closed the truck door and sat in the passenger seat. I sat between the passenger and drivers' seat and practically threw my arms around Rick, "Glad to see you're alive ranger Rick."

Rick smiled and chuckled, "I told you I'd be back didn't I?" I smiled back.

As we rode to Camp everyone was silent, still reeling from barely making it out of Atlanta alive.

* * *

><p>When we pulled up to the camp everyone got out. Rick turned to me before he got out. "Be on guard. We don't know all these people. Anything happens let me know?"<p>

I nodded, "Thanks Rick, You did good." As we got out I stayed close to Rick as we walked forward. "Lexie? Helicopter Boy. Come say Hello." Morales smiled. It was a mosh pit of people. Suddenly Rick took a step forwards to a little boy and a woman. The little boy yelled "Dad? Dad!" Rick ran and hugged a little boy and the woman; Lori and Carl. Everyone was in awe at the happy reunion. He had found his family.

I stayed behind. Glenn looked back at me as did an Old man. Hell they probably felt sorry for me. Whatever. If Rick found his family then he didn't need me to watch his back anymore.

* * *

><p>At dinner Rick and the others jokingly told the treacherous trail of our fight out of Atlanta. Rick was cozied up with Lori and Carl across the fire. I sat next to Glenn and T-Dog. The odd men out like me. I mostly stayed quiet. I felt uncomfortable and I didn't have much to say, until Shane looked over to me.<p>

"How did you two group up together Rick?" Shane asked.

Rick chuckled, "I was on my way to Atlanta when I ran out of gas. Lexie here was at the farmhouse I stopped at to look for more."

"You were by yourself?" Rick's wife Lori asked, sounding very concerned. I nodded. It wasn't that weird. And I had been doing just fine on my own.

"How old are you?" Dale asked.

"16" I mumbled out.

"What happened? Why were you by yourself?" Shane asked, looking me directly in the eye, as if challenging mine and Rick's story.

"Just ended up that way I guess." I said very bluntly, while staring him down. Everyone in the group stayed quiet and shifted uncomfortably. Everyone except a big guy named Ed. He stood up and added a log to the fire while looking at me. The way he had been looking at me since I arrived made me squirm. It was like a lion stalking its prey.

Shane sighed as we all turned to look, "Hey Ed. You wanna rethink that log?"

"It's cold man." Ed replied not moving.

"Cold doesn't change the rules does it?" Shane asked. "We keep our fires low, just embers so we can't be seen from a distance. Right?"

Ed looked back at Shane, "I said it's cold. Just mind your own damn business for once."

I looked at Rick who was looking between Ed and Shane and felt a confrontation coming on. Shane stormed over, "He Ed. You sure you want to have this conversation?"

Ed looked to the woman sitting across from him. His wife Carol. "Well go on then. Pull the damn thing out. Go on!" He said hurriedly to the woman. She jumped and pulled the log out of the fire.

I felt bad for Carol. Their daughter Sophia. Ed seemed like not a good person.

After that when things started winding down, everyone was going to turn in for the night. Rick got up to leave with Lori and Carl and looked over to me. "Come on Lexie. Come sleep in our tent" Well this was awkward. Lori and Carl had barely said 2 words to me and Rick practically ignored me after he had found his family. Not that I blamed him I probably would too.

Lori opened her mouth to say something, perhaps that she didn't want a strange girl sleeping in their tent, but then shut it quickly. Thankfully Dale interceded.

"Hey Rick. The tents are kind of small, she's always welcome to stay in the RV it's plenty big and I have an extra bed." I nodded, still very awkward with the situation.

Rick looked uncomfortable with that arrangement at me sleeping in an RV with a strange older man, no matter how friendly. He looked to me then back to Dale and Lori. "I want her to stay with me. But thanks for your offer."

I quietly said goodnight to everyone and followed after them to the tent. It was pretty big actually, enough room to fit 4 people comfortably. I set down my stuff as Lori unrolled a cot and placed it next to Carl's. "Carl baby. I'll be back I need to talk to your daddy real quick." He nodded as Lori and Rick left. I felt like they were talking about me. And I wanted to know why.

I turned to Carl, "I'm just going to brush my teeth and then I'll be back."

Carl just nodded at me.

I quietly crept out and went around to the backside of the tent. I could hear them talking about 20 yards away. I hid behind a tree and listened.

"But we don't know this girl!" Lori pleaded.

"But I do! Lori she is the reason I am here right now! She saved me. Once. In Atlanta a walker was behind me and I didn't know it was about 3 feet from me before she killed it and saved me. Which is the reason I am back here now. She is a real good kid. She's just had to grow up fast. She smart and strong and she can handle herself well." Rick replied.

"Rick what happened to her? Why was she by herself?" Lori asked.

"I don't know. She's very private. But I know she's alone. And she's already here and that's where she is going to stay." I couldn't see Lori because she was facing Rick with her back to me. But I'm guessing she made an angry face, because she stalked off right after. Great. I haven't even been here for one day and I was already causing problems.

I turned to leave and practically ran into him. Ed. I gasped as he stood there smiling down at me. "My what are we doing out this late huh?"

I gulped and held up my toothbrush. "I was just brushing my teeth." I looked down at my feet. I didn't have any weapons on me I left them in the tent. What an idiot.

My hair fell covering my face and Ed gently tucked a golden lock behind my ear and leaned in. "You'll want to be careful Lexie. It's dangerous out here. You never know who or what will be waiting." He whispered. Then he straightened up and left.

Well that was it. I had made the decision. I would be leaving tomorrow. Lori didn't want me here. Carl didn't like me. Rick wouldn't choose me over his family. This fucking perv was hitting on me. It was settled, tomorrow I would slip out, quietly, without anyone knowing. I quickly brushed my teeth and started walking back towards the tent when somebody grabbed my arm. I nearly screamed but then I saw who it was and turned around relieved.

"Rick! What the hell?" I said.

He quickly let go. "What the hell is right. What are you doing out here?"

"I- I was just brushing my teeth. I'm headed back now." I stammered.

Rick sighed, "Lexie you have to be careful. You shouldn't be out at night okay? It's not safe."

No shit, really? "Oh….sorry."

Rick just looked at me. "It's fine. Come on Lexie let's go back." I thought about telling Rick about my encounter with Ed but decided against it. No reason too since I would be leaving. Lori would be relieved. We quietly walked into the tent. Lori didn't even look up. I laid down next to Carl who was already fast asleep. Wishing I could be anywhere else but here.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

I woke up to Carl rustling as he was getting up. "Sorry." He whispered.

"It's alright" I replied yawning. I pulled clothes out of my bag as Carl left the tent.

After I was dressed I went outside and everyone was out bustling and moving around. Surprisingly it was only 7am. I guess we were on farming hours since there wasn't electricity. But there was a lot of talk. Mostly about what to do about Daryl Dixon, Merle's brother. Rick had offered to go get him last night, I overheard him telling Lori. Lori was against it along with that other sheriff guy Shane. Something about him threw me off. But I wasn't sure what yet. Although I didn't intend to find out. Now seemed like as good a time as any. I quietly went back into the tent.

I quietly packed up my stuff and looked over at Rick who was still sleeping. Part of me wanted to say good bye, but I knew it was better this way. I made sure the coast was clear before starting to walk. If anybody saw my stuff they'd know I was trying to leave. Not that they could do anything about it, nor that any of them would care. But they might tell Rick. And Rick would care. I walked around the outside of the camp careful to avoid Dale and his binoculars on top of the RV. I was maybe a half mile out when I heard a twig snap behind me. Cautiously I turned around. There was a guy with a crossbow pointed directly at my head. Fucking awesome. I was so unbelievably fucked right now.

"What do you want?" I asked as he lowered the crossbow.

"Nothin' what are you doing this far into the woods?" He asked.

"Well trying to leave, but I keep getting turned around."

"You alone?" I gulped I wouldn't expose myself again. "No I'm with a group I just got lost. They're nearby, a big group." If need be I could run back to them. I could run like hell for a half mile to avoid being raped.

"They comin' this way?" He sounded concerned. Good.

"They're already stationed here by the quarry." I replied.

"Are you sure because I have a group who's at the quarry and we've never seen your group?" Suddenly it dawned on me. Merle's brother who was off hunting. They had the same southern redneck twang.

"Daryl?" I asked.

He looked confused as hell, "Do I know you."

"I was with your group! Shane and Glenn and Dale. I came with Lori's husband Rick."

"I thought her husband was dead." He questioned.

"He's not they're back at the quarry."

"Well good thing you ran into me. Come on I'll show you the way back so you don't get lost." He gestured.

"Oh uh actually. I lied. I'm leaving the group. I know where they are." I admitted.

"Why are you leaving?" He asked.

"It's a dying group. Pretty soon walkers are going to start wandering up here and I don't plan to be around when they do. And I'm the odd man out. I'm by myself."

"You tell anyone you were leavin'?" I shook my head no. "Well I don't feel very comfortable letting some girl run off on her own. And if anybody in the group finds out they'd skin me. So you should come back with me."

"Are you forcing me to?" I asked quietly.

"Only if you make me…" Well damn. Now I had to go back. I could try to make a run for it but with all this gear I'd never make it very far. "'Sides you're gonna help me carry this here deer."

"Venison. Yum." I said sarcastically.

"Come on grab it's ass….uh"

"Lexie." I replied as I picked up its legs.

As soon as we neared the camp Daryl stopped. "Hold on I need to take a piss." He ran off about 50 years away.

"Charming." I replied. I was standing there waiting when Carl and Sophia and Jacqui walked by.

"Lexie?" Jacqui asked. "What are you doing down here?" Fuck.

"Oh I was just uh helping with the hunting." She opened her mouth to reply but didn't have time because right then two walkers came from behind us. Out of nowhere. Oh fuck.

"Mom! Dad!" Carl screamed. "Momma."

The one closest to me grabbed my arm. I screamed bloody fucking murder. "No!" I pulled out my gun form the holster and shot him in the mouth. Then I ran like fucking hell. Everyone either heard the shot go off or Carl's shouting because everyone came running towards me.

I fell to my knees just before the clearing about 15 feet from where I left the walker. I was panting heavily. I couldn't breathe.

"Lexie? Lexie are you okay?" Multiple people and hands were talking at me and pulling me to my feet.

"I'm fine!" I said breathlessly. I turned back to go see what happened to the other walker. It was sitting there eating the deer and everyone starting beating the holy living shit out of it. Daryl was going to be pissed. I was pissed. I just lugged that thing a damn half mile and that shit ain't light. As expected Daryl came back and was furious. When he was told what happened to Merle he was driven with rage. He pulled a knife on Rick and had to be subdued. But eventually he calmed down after it was agreed upon that they would go back and find Merle.

Before he left Rick pulled me aside, "Lexie? What were you doing out there today? I got up and nobody could find you and Daryl said you helped him bring the deer back? Why were you out there by yourself that far? With your stuff?" He sounded like a damn overprotective parent. Well I decided to be honest with him.

"Well I was leaving. And I crossed paths with Daryl and he said he'd force me to come back if I didn't voluntarily because he'd get skinned."

Rick looked into my eyes, "Why were you trying to leave?"

"I- I just didn't think I really fit in here is all. Especially since you found Lori and Carl I admitted. I just don't fit in." I looked very sheepish I'm sure.

"Lexie." Rick sighed. Here it goes he's telling me to get my act together, I wasn't his damn problem. "There's not that many people that I can trust in this world. But you happen to be one of them. I want you to stay with Lori and Me and Carl. I don't want you to leave. Unless it's with us. I was worried sick when I couldn't find you." That was actually really sweet.

"Okay... I'll stay." I finally said.

"There's one last thing, I'm going to be gone okay, and I would really appreciate it if you would watch Carl for me alright? As a favor. You're tough and you have a damn good shot."

I smiled, "I know I do."

Rick chuckled, "so is that a yes?"

I sighed, "Sure thing ranger Rick. Oh and try not to do anything stupid." I added. Rick smiled before turning and walking away.

I was looking around for something to do when Lori called my name, "Hey Lexie come here." Lori handed me a granola bar and an orange, "Breakfast", Lori smiled at me. Well this was new. I was almost certain that she hadn't liked me.

"Thanks" I replied, I was about to turn away when I realized I didn't really have anything else to do, "Oh is there anything I could do to help right now, I don't have any plans." I smiled sheepishly.

Lori chuckled, "Yeah a bunch of the ladies are about to go down to the quarry to do some laundry. I'm sure if you offered your services it would be greatly appreciated."

I smiled, "Sure thing."

I went to the bathroom before walking down to the quarry. I didn't know exactly where I was going but I saw Carl walking towards me. "Hey the quarry down there?" I asked.

"Yeah keep going straight." Carl replied before smiling at me. I smiled back and kept on walking. Maybe Rick talked to them because Carl and Lori were both being extremely pleasant. I must have gotten turned around because suddenly I saw the women doing the laundry on the other side of the water. And I heard talking. I moved forward quietly and heard Lori and Shane talking.

"You don't tell me what to do. You lost that privilege." Lori said angrily.

"Dammit, Lori. Look, I don't know how it appears to you or what you think…" Shane said back.

Lori looked surprised, "How it appears to me? I'm sorry. Is there a gray area here? Let me dispel it. You stay away from me. You stay away from my son. You don't look at him. You don't talk to him. From now on, my family is off-limits to you."

"Lori I don't think that's fair!" Shane said raising his voice.

"Shane, shut up! Don't!" Lori practically yelled back.

Holy shit. They had been sleeping together. Behind Ricks back. Well I guess technically not since Lori had thought he was dead. But still it hadn't even been that long. I had heard enough. I quietly back-tracked and went around to the other side of the quarry and offered my services which were gratefully accepted. I was sitting at the washbasin scrubbing clothes when Andrea and Ed started getting into it. Suddenly Ed was hitting Carol and everyone was trying to hold him off and it was a huge fucking mess until Shane came up and started beating the holy living shit out of him. Amy and I held Carol back until she broke free and ran to his side. I will never understand why she did that. After he had just punched her, in the face her mouth dripping with blood she ran to his side and helped him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**I didn't do it for this chapter but what do you guys think if i start doing previews of the next chapter just a little snippet? Yes/no**

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><p>Later that day after the laundry was done and things had quieted down I noticed Jim was up at the clearing digging. I watched him for a few minutes digging in the hot sun. Maybe he needed help. I went up there to ask him.<p>

"Jim? What are you doing out here?" He blatantly ignored me. I stood there for a few minutes. "Do you need any help?" More silence. "Do you want me to bring you some water at least?" Nothing. I turned back and went to ask Dale what he was doing. Dale said he didn't know and then went up there to talk to him. When he came back the whole group headed up there.

Jim was digging like crazy. He wasn't doing good. Jim said he wasn't bothering anyone. He was preparing. And the only reason he got away was because they ate his family and not him, he could still here their screams. I could understand his pain, perhaps better than anyone else here. They grabbed the shovel from Jim as he took a swing at everyone and Shane had to subdue him, then they tied him up to the tree so he couldn't dehydrate himself. I was sitting playing with a stick in the dirt near Carl and Sophia and Carol and Lori when Shane came up and offered Jim some water. After he left Jim apologized to Carl and Sophia for scaring them. Shane left with Carl and Sophia to go clean the fish while Dale hung back and talked with Lori and Carol. I breathed in deeply and went over to talk to Jim. I felt sorry for him. Truly I did. And I understood why he had snapped. I felt like I would snap sometimes.

I sat down next to him and smiled. "Hey Jim."

He smiled back sadly, "Hey Lexie. I'm sorry for ignoring you earlier. I-, I just lost it I guess."

"We all lose it sometimes, it's not your fault." I replied. He looked down embarrassed and not really sure where this conversation was going. "Jim? I just wanted to let you know, you're not the only one."

"Only one what?" He looked up at me.

"Who lived because your family died for you," Jim looked down at his feet again.

"My family, they- they're all dead." I breathed deeply, I knew Lori and Carol and Dale were listening. Hell they could know what happened, I wasn't tryin' to hide it. "When the breakout happened, my family decided to stay on our farm. We had a pretty big property on the outside of town. It wasn't far enough away. It was overrun early on they- they didn't make it, my sister Abigail, my mom, my dad. It was just me and my little brother Timmy who got out. He was 12. We holed up for a couple days at a different farmhouse after we had left. We didn't-" I paused. "_I_ didn't, know what to do. I thought it might be better to move at night. Tim he didn't- he didn't want to go. But I made him. I thought if we moved at night then we wouldn't run into any people. I thought we could handle any walkers. And that night we moved out. I forced him too. And we were walking through the woods. The walker is just- it came out of nowhere, it latched onto him." I felt my throat get caught on my words, "It ripped out his throat. I- I put down the walker and then I held him in my arms during his final moments." I swallowed the lump in my throat. It was the first time I had told anyone what happened. I was too far away; I couldn't get to him in time. "After he died I stayed there for a while, holding him. He looked so scared, even in death." Jim hadn't looked at me the whole time I had been talking. "I can still here his screams when I close my eyes. Or the gurgling sound he made as he bled to death." I paused and looked over to Jim whom was crying, whether weeping for his own family, or my family, or both, I didn't know.

"How do you deal with it, everyday, that they died while you lived?" Jim whispered.

I thought about it for a minute, "You can't change the past. You can't go back. I would give anything for him to be here right now instead of me, anything. But he can't be. You can't give up. Is that how you want them seeing you in heaven? They're in a better place right now. Maybe even playing with my little brother. They wouldn't want you to give up. They gave their lives so you could live. You can't disrespect them by giving up. You owe it to them and you owe it to yourself Jim. They'd want you to keep fighting, to come out of the other side."

Jim nodded, "I'm sorry about your family Lexie."

I smiled sadly, "Me too." I patted his shoulder and stood up and turned around. Lori, Carol and Dale were all standing there as expected. Eavesdropping. I could see the look they were giving me. It was a look of pity. I _hated_ pity. I said nothing as I left. I headed straight to the tent.

The night he died was the last time I had cried. I hadn't shed a tear in weeks. I hadn't even talked to anyone before I met Rick. I was so angry. I was so angry. It wasn't fair. At all. I didn't have anybody, no one. And then I got angrier at myself before nobody guaranteed me anything in this life so why was I so entitled? I picked up my backpack and ripped open the front pocket pulling out the picture. It was the five of us. Taken probably two months before it happened. I threw my backpack across the tent and it hit the wall practically collapsing the tent on top of me. I stared at the picture and I got even angrier. Why was I here? In a flash of rage I tore the picture into two and then into four and then let go and watched them flutter to the ground. After I realized what I had done I sobbed. That was my only picture. That's when she came. Lori. I don't know if she heard me or she just came to check on me. She put her arms around me. Restraining me or comforting me, I didn't know. I fought like hell. I didn't want this woman touching me. The more I struggled the tighter she held. Finally I gave in. I stood there sobbing into her chest, while she stroked me hair. I was so tired of fighting. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, sorry." She whispered. We stayed like that for a long time.

That night I sat around the campfire with everyone. We were enjoying a fish fry courtesy of Andrea and Amy. It was the first hot meal I'd had in a couple of weeks. And it was good too. Carl and I had been playing cards. "Hey Carl. I have a surprise." I said.

"What is it?" He asked eagerly.

"Come on, let's go get it."

"Lexie where are you going?" Lori asked.

"Just to the tent." I replied.

Lori nodded, "Be careful." I smiled before turning and walking, my arm around Carl. As we got into the tent I got down onto my knees and pulled the package of Oreo's out of my backpack. Carl's face lit up.

"Where did you get those?!" He asked.

I laughed, "I found them. I thought you might like to share them with everyone." I opened the package and offered him one, which he quickly took. I took one myself before closing up the package. "Now come on. If we stay here any longer we might eat the whole pack!" I said playfully.

"I'm okay with that." Carl said.

I laughed again, "Come on you dork." I gave Carl the package as we started walking back.

As we neared the RV it was really dark. I saw Beth come out of the RV and then I saw it. The walker came around the corner. Carl gasped. "Amy!" I yelled.

Amy screamed as it bit her arm and everyone turned around. "NO!" Andrea screamed a devastating scream. That's when they all came out, a herd of walkers. I instinctively stood in front of Carl, holding him behind me. Now I had to think. We were at least 20 feet away from the fire with 3 or 4 walkers in between. Carl was with me so that wouldn't work. The path from here to the RV was empty except for the walker eating Amy. I didn't have time to help her now. But any of them could over run the inside of the RV. Then it came to me. I'd be damned if I let another little boy get eaten. They were coming and I had to act now. Carl was frozen next to me. "Carl come one!" Carl stayed put. I practically dragged him by his shirt just so he'd understand that it was time to move. He dropped the bag of Oreo's on the ground. I pulled out my gun ready to shoot. I pulled Carl and started running towards the back of the RV. As we neared the back ladder two walkers came from around the jeep parked behind the RV. "Carl get on top of the RV now!" Carl did as I told him while I shot both of the walkers. Then I started climbing up the ladder. Right before I reached the top a walker grabbed my leg and tried to pull me back down.

"Ahhhhhhh!" I screamed.

"Lexie!" Carl yelled. He grabbed onto my hand and tried to pull me up. Panic was building in my chest. I managed to kick the walker in the head and pull myself up. I rolled on my back gasping for breath. But the group needed help. I quickly stood up and assessed the scene. Maybe 30 walkers had infiltrated the camp. It was impossible to know who we had lost until after it was under control. I grabbed my gun and first shot the walker who had grabbed me, then I started shooting at the walkers who were moving in on the group by the campfire. A walker almost came up and got Shane but I saw him first. Pop. Shane's back was covered in Walker's Blood. He looked up and made eye contact with me. 'Yeah you're welcome' I thought to myself. That's when Rick, Glenn, T-Dog and Daryl showed up and took out the rest of the walkers.

"Carl!" Lori was yelling.

"Momma!" Carl yelled back from the top of the RV. He moved to leave.

"Carl be careful!" I climbed down first, cautiously, aware that not all the walkers might be fully dead, and then help Carl down. One walker maybe 6 feet from us picked up it head and snarled. I could feel Carl gripping my arm behind me. I shot it clean in the head and quickly ran to the center where everyone was holding Carl close to me.

It was a total shit storm. A lot of bodies. Everywhere.

"Son of a bitch!" Shane yelled kicking over a cup of water by the fire. Lori grabbed onto me and Carl and held us.

"Shane stop!" Lori yelled.

"No!" He stormed over to Rick, "You tell me man, you tell me why you wanted to leave when we need you here! Our losses could have been cut in half! If any at all!"

"Or they could have been double without the ammo and firearms we brought back!" Rick shot back.

"What are we going to do tonight?!" Dale said.

I looked around the circle. Everyone looked terrified. Carol was clutching Sophia. Morales kids were wrapped around him. Rick look at me and Carl. "Lexie I want you to take all the kids, take them into the RV alright? Keep watch from inside." I nodded and Lori reluctantly let go of Carl and me.

I cautiously herded everyone into the RV. Carl stopped to pick up the bag of Oreo's. Inside the RV all the kids sat down at the table. They all had tear-stained faces. It was a hard blow for them. They hadn't seen that kind of damage up close yet. I sighed and opened the pack of Oreo's offering them each one. They all nibbled on it saying nothing. There wasn't much to say about what happened.


End file.
